I will have to confess that sometimes I lay awake at night held captive by the thought police. Some otherwise meaningless night-time kerfuffles will awaken me. These are uninvited slumber slips or sleep interruptions, that take me from my intended dreamland. But I have found a solution! If I take the time and focus on some place where we used to live, I can open a whole library of homes that I can draw from.
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Before moving to California a couple of years ago, I would usually begin my night-time pillow trip from a military base an hour's drive west of my folks home. I guess I chose that place because it was a rare and treasured vacation. We spent a week living within driving distance of my Mom and Dad. Each morning during this vacation I would get up early and drive on deserted streets before the sun was up to take a morning walk with my folks.
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Now that I live closer to them and take weekly real-time trips to visit them, I have had to change my dozing destinations. I escape my nonstop thoughts with thought trips to Frankfurt, Bangkok, and surprisingly even, Seoul. I say, "Surprisingly to Seoul" because living there was my least desired dwelling place for a long time even after I left. Seoul was noisy and dirty and my husband and I lived apart. I felt vulnerable there and so very tired but the years have erased the fear and now I see that Asian port as another adventure.
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While on these mental red-eye flights, I do not actually see anyone on the streets or corners or steps of the places I travel to. What I see are the land marks like large trees and complicated intersections and colorful buildings -- places that were impishly taken for granted when I actually passed by.
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Most of the time, I begin my imaginary journey by simply recalling the process of getting out of bed, dressing, and stepping in my rental car. Then I turn on the ignition, maybe even the radio, and take off imagining each corner and street from yesteryear. I usually don't make it all the way to my destination before sleep interrupts my journey. But I don't mind, I've made it to where I really wanted to go in the first place ... my pillow.
---
Before moving to California a couple of years ago, I would usually begin my night-time pillow trip from a military base an hour's drive west of my folks home. I guess I chose that place because it was a rare and treasured vacation. We spent a week living within driving distance of my Mom and Dad. Each morning during this vacation I would get up early and drive on deserted streets before the sun was up to take a morning walk with my folks.
---
Now that I live closer to them and take weekly real-time trips to visit them, I have had to change my dozing destinations. I escape my nonstop thoughts with thought trips to Frankfurt, Bangkok, and surprisingly even, Seoul. I say, "Surprisingly to Seoul" because living there was my least desired dwelling place for a long time even after I left. Seoul was noisy and dirty and my husband and I lived apart. I felt vulnerable there and so very tired but the years have erased the fear and now I see that Asian port as another adventure.
---
While on these mental red-eye flights, I do not actually see anyone on the streets or corners or steps of the places I travel to. What I see are the land marks like large trees and complicated intersections and colorful buildings -- places that were impishly taken for granted when I actually passed by.
---
Most of the time, I begin my imaginary journey by simply recalling the process of getting out of bed, dressing, and stepping in my rental car. Then I turn on the ignition, maybe even the radio, and take off imagining each corner and street from yesteryear. I usually don't make it all the way to my destination before sleep interrupts my journey. But I don't mind, I've made it to where I really wanted to go in the first place ... my pillow.
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